Presenting Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs
by Tashmania
Summary: (Chapter 3 is up!) MWPP-Will span 4 years or so charting how the Marauders came into existence-finding out about Remus, becoming Animagi, etc. RR!
1. On the train

Chapter 1 

A/N: This is my first Marauders fanfic. Basically, Remus hides his secret from his friends, but they aren't as stupid as they look. Follow their journey from discovery to Animagi transformations.

Disclaimer: JK Rowling owns all these characters, I am not worthy, yadda yadda. Now on with the story!

            The gleaming scarlet steam engine that was merrily making a noise in the station would have attracted attention anywhere. But this was platform 9¾, and none of the wizards and witches gathered around saying their goodbyes to their children paid much attention to the Hogwarts Express. One boy in particular was trying his very best to prise himself from his mother's grip.

            "Mum, **get off**!" He leapt back from his mother's arms and rubbed his cheek where she had kissed him. He looked up to see his mother's eyes shining.

            "Oh James I'm sorry, it's just that you look so grown-up, in your second year at Hogwarts now, and oh, my baby boy…" Here she dissolved into tears again and James Potter rolled his eyes in silent exasperation. A boy with hair as dark as James' suddenly walked up behind Mrs Potter and gave James a wink that said, "I'll take care of this." He opened his mouth and said,

            "Mrs Potter?" Mrs Potter turned and smiled when she saw who it was.

            "Hello dear, how are you?" The boy arranged his face into a mock-distraught expression.

            "I'm hurt, Mrs Potter. You, my second mum, are here crying and I, Sirius Black, can do nothing to help. Except this." He effortlessly pulled her into a gentle hug, an effortless task as he easily towered above Mrs Potter. Sirius Black looked fairly unfriendly… he was tall for his twelve years, with dark hair and eyes that could change from warm to aggressive in a second. But he held a special place in his heart for the Potters, and therefore he looked upon Mrs Potter as a second mother. He looked down kindly and said, 

"Now, I'll look after Jamesy-poo for you, as long as you promise me one thing, Mum." When she looked at him quizzically, he bent down and whispered something that made her burst out laughing, her tears forgotten. As the whistle blew, Sirius let go of Mrs Potter and ran for the train. He boarded and looked back in time to see James also hug his mum, then run after Sirius. They walked along the corridor of the train as it pulled out of Kings Cross, looking for their friends.

            "Must you flirt with my mother?" growled James to Sirius. Sirius held up his hands.

            "Eurgh! I don't flirt with her James… on the contrary I love her to bits. She's like the mum I never had. She's a hell of a lot better than my old bat, and cleverer too. My mum's so stupid that she blinked and got lost." In spite of himself, James had to laugh at this.

*          *          *

            Sat quietly in one of the carriages was a pale, slim boy with sandy blond hair. He had pale skin as it was, but he looked even paler for some reason. To a passer-by, it would appear as if he was ill, but Remus Lupin knew better than to imagine that he was just suffering with a headache. The full moon was fast approaching; tomorrow night on the 2nd of September he would have to go through his monthly ritual of deceit. He hated lying as it was, but lying to his closest friends made him feel even worse. He'd never had friends like them before… would he lose them if they knew…? He closed his eyes and lost himself in thought. He couldn't have been sat there for more than five minutes when his reverie was interrupted by the sound of someone calling his name with a loud, bark-like shout. The next thing he knew, he was being roughly yet playfully tackled to the ground. He opened his eyes to be confronted by one of his best friends apparently trying to squeeze him to death.

            "Hello Sirius," said Remus calmly. Sirius straightened up and surveyed Remus closely.

            "Dammit Lupin, does nothing fluster you? I perform a spectacular tackle on you worthy of Ireland's star Beater and all you can do is say hello to me? Hi to you too, by the way." James now came into view and he helped Remus up from the floor.

            "Ignore him Remus, it's great to see you again, mate! How come you never answered my letters during the summer? I must have sent you about one a week." Remus shifted uncomfortably as they all sat down; time to put on the mask of deceit.

            "Ah you know how it is James, parents and all that. Mine wanted me to spend time with them this summer, so I didn't really get time to reply to anyone, I'm sorry." James nodded, although he wasn't entirely convinced by this explanation. Remus hurriedly changed the subject and asked where Peter was. Peter Pettigrew was the fourth member of their little gang, and at the moment he was nowhere to be seen. Sirius yawned.

            "I hope he's not getting beaten up again. I don't really fancy wading into a fight so early in the school year." He looked round lazily to see James and Remus staring open-mouthed at him. Remus got up and put his hand on Sirius' forehead. 

            "No, he's not feverish." Sirius slapped Remus light-heartedly and shrugged.

            "I'm just tired and don't want to march into anything before I have to." The minute the words were out of his mouth, the sounds of what was unmistakably Peter Pettigrew whimpering floated into their carriage. Sirius rolled his eyes and heaved himself up from his chair. "I'll be back in a second." He was true to his word; in no time at all, he came strolling into the carriage, Peter in front of him. Peter looked relieved, Sirius looked faintly irritated, and James heard him mutter something about some people always needing to hang around with people bigger than them. As they sat down, the four boys began to play Exploding Snap and wonder aloud what their second year at Hogwarts would have in store for them.

*          *          * 

            The Great Hall looked as wonderful as it had done to the group of four last year when they had first arrived at Hogwarts. The Sorting had finished and they were all tucking into food, Remus slightly less eagerly than most. He felt sick and knew what was in store; nausea was always the first sign with him.

            "You alright?" James' voice jerked Remus out of his thoughts and he smiled somewhat weakly. 

            "Yeah I'm okay, I feel a little bit ill though. I must be coming down with something." At this, Sirius glanced up from his plate, astonishment written all over his face.

            "Lupin we've been back, what, ten minutes? And already you need Madam Pomfrey? I'm beginning to wonder about you two." Remus flushed, and vaguely muttered something about having a weak immune system. Sirius grinned and said, "Besides, look at Peter. Beaten up on the train and yet he's eating like this is his last meal. Like Judas at the Last Supper, eh Pete?" Peter looked up, completely oblivious to what Sirius had said and asked whether they'd heard about Professor Binns. Remus reluctantly picked up a chicken leg and began to eat with small bites; not noticing the puzzled look James gave him. The look was only wiped from his face when Dumbledore dismissed them all.

*          *          *

            On the morning of the 3rd of September, Remus was nowhere to be seen. A query from James to their Head of House Professor McGonagall revealed that Remus was in the hospital wing. James accepted this news quite calmly, then at breakfast motioned to Sirius and Peter to follow him. They headed back up to the Gryffindor common room, Peter clutching a stack of toast. When they reached the common room, where a fire was blazing, Sirius and Peter stared in bewilderment as James walked around it making absolutely sure that nobody else was present in the room. When he had satisfied himself, Sirius spoke.

            "Okay Potter, why the serious face?" Peter chimed in.

            "James, you look like you've just been told you've been dropped from the house team. What's up?"  
            "Remus," answered James perplexedly. The other two visibly relaxed at this.

            "What about him?" asked Peter flippantly. "He's not well again, I know that, but it can't be anything serious." James angrily rounded on Peter the minute he said this.

            "Peter, use your head! Remus has been in that hospital wing every month since we started at Hogwarts. Doesn't that tell you something?"

            "Madam Pomfrey has a cute secret daughter?" ventured Sirius mischievously. He stopped when James fixed him with a stare, and then went on.

            "What I'm saying," James continued whilst pacing the room, "is that it doesn't add up. None of it adds up. Why is it that none of the teachers ever chase Remus up about his work if he's off so much? If it was any of us they'd be breathing fire, but he gets away with it, and I want to know why. Besides, I'm worried about him." Sirius looked at James with a look of slight worry.

            "James, listen to me. You sound like you're suggesting that Lupin has got some kind of illness that he's keeping secret from us." James waved his arms hopelessly, before rubbing his eyes.

            "I don't know if that's it or what. But dammit, we're his closest friends! Doesn't he trust us enough to tell us what ails him every single bloody month?" Peter shrugged hopelessly.

            "If he was a girl, I'd say it was, well, you know. Affected by the cycle of the moon and all that." Sirius laughed in spite of himself.

            "Lighten up Peter, you make him sound like a werewolf." Catching James' expression, his voice changed. "Look kid, I'm worried about Lupin too, and so is Peter. But we're not going to find anything out if we're sat here. Let's go up to the hospital wing and ask him ourselves, okay?" James nodded his agreement and the three of them set off towards the hospital wing. When they got there however, they were to be disappointed.

            "No." Madam Pomfrey looked unusually stern as she surveyed the three boys. There was also a hint of something else on her face, something that Sirius couldn't quite place. Was it fear, unease or pity? James muttered in Sirius' ear, 

"Will you hurry up with your whole 'Black Charm' thing?" Sirius grinned and looked up to face Madam Pomfrey, his eyes now large puppy dog pools of brown. 

"Madam Pomfrey, why do you begrudge us a look at our dear friend Mr Lupin? We only want to update him on the Quidditch… he loves the Wasps and we wanted to tell him how they thrashed the Cannons 250 to 40. It'd make him ever so happy, and would naturally confirm your position as the most benevolent and beautiful matron this side of St Mungos." James and Peter stifled their giggles as they saw Madam Pomfrey fight to suppress a smile. But any hopes they had of talking her round were dashed as she regained her composure and chivvied them out of the hospital wing. As they sat down on the steps Peter, careful to keep his voice casual so as not to give anything away, asked Sirius and James if they'd spotted anything out of the ordinary. When they shook their heads, he said,

"The thing is, I was peering round Madam Pomfrey when Sirius was talking to her. You can see all the hospital beds from that door, and every single one of them is empty and made. Remus isn't in the wing." When he heard this, James leapt up, fury apparent in his face. Sirius, who knew James' rages, groaned inwardly.

"Well, do you think that someone would mind telling us **where the hell he is **then?! Only, we are his best friends and all." A voice behind them made them all whirl round and come face to face with Remus himself.

"Do you really want to know?"

-           -           -

Dun dun dun! Cliffhanger! And that's the first chapter! Please R/R to tell me what you think. Constructive criticism is welcome :)


	2. Revelations

Chapter 2 

A/N: I've just realised something. Anyone who doesn't understand any British slang terms I use, just ask me what they mean! R/R as per usual.

            James stared at Remus for a moment, and then said quite calmly, "Yes, I would like to know." Remus' broke into a grin, which surprised the other three.

            "Aww James, I didn't know you cared." At a scowl from James and guffaws from Peter and Sirius he continued. "I went for a walk… I was in the hospital wing all last night and needed some fresh air. Mind you, I didn't expect to come back to find you shouting." Peter stole a glance at James who now looked slightly thrown off course, and then looked back at Remus.

            "You're feeling better now though, right?" When Remus nodded he continued, "So what was up with you then?" Remus crossed his fingers behind his back as he answered.

            "I wasn't feeling well on the train, then I think I ate something bad at dinner. I'm okay now though, no more vomiting here." These words jerked Sirius out of his thoughts.

            "Yuck, thanks for that mental image Lupin!" Remus grinned and in spite of himself, James did too.

            "Sorry about, erm, that little shouting bout I had there. I was just erm… well, I was… oh, you know..." Remus cut him off here with a small smile.

            "Yeah, I know." He punched James good-naturedly, James punched him back in the same way and a play fight would have broken out if a voice hadn't bellowed,

            "Potter!" James groaned and turned to see Professor McGonagall glaring at him. She strode up to him and carried on. "No fighting in the corridors, magical or not! Especially not when the person on the receiving end has just come out of the hospital wing. You're lucky I'm not taking any points away from Gryffindor for your behaviour." Remus tried to interrupt to explain that he'd actually started it, but McGonagall was having none of it. James apologised, then as she walked away he scowled and mimicked her voice.

            "_No fighting in the corridors, magical or not! _Jeez, why does she always shout at me? I didn't even start it that time." Sirius sighed melodramatically and threw an arm around James.

            "Dear boy, you're the loud one. They always go for the loud ones; why do you think I get told off so much and Lupin here never does? Course, it could be because he does his work and I don't… no matter. Now, when will we get round to that game of Gobstones you promised me yesterday?" The quartet chatted away as they made their way to their lessons that day, and later on that night they engaged in a furious game of Gobstones, of which James was the victor for the sixtieth time running. 

*          *          *

            "Defence Against the Dark Arts with the Slytherins for the second year running? Yuck. What did we do to deserve this?" asked Sirius as they sat down in the DADA classroom the morning after the little episode in the hospital wing. Remus pulled a face.

            "No idea. Did you do anything to upset Professor Morgan?" Sirius screwed up his face in concentration. While he was thinking, the professor entered and held up his hands for silence. As the class died down Sirius, oblivious to the sudden hush around him, said loudly,

            "Well I did write one of my essays for Morgan in Vanishing ink, but I don't think he realised; the type I used only comes into effect after an hour." He looked round happily, and his smile faded when he realised the entire class was gawping at him and Professor Morgan was looking annoyed yet mildly amused.

            "Thank you for that information Mr Black," he said coolly. "I'll remember to check your work in future." Sirius swore under his breath, and Professor Morgan began to talk to the rest of the class.

            "Now that certain members of the class have finished confessing their sins"-the girls in the class tittered-"I can carry on with my class. You will begin this year of study by studying creatures, beginning with the werewolf." When he heard this, Remus' face slowly drained of all colour. They couldn't, surely… Professor Dumbledore would have told him. He hesitantly raised his hand. James, Sirius and Peter all stared at him, then at each other in utter bewilderment.

            "Professor, one of my friends in the year above told me we'd be studying Red Caps first this year? I've already prepared for that." Professor Morgan looked closely at Remus, who was silently willing him to change the lesson's subject to Boggarts. _Just for today, let him hear what I'm trying to say, change the bloody subject you puffed-up old fool. _Then he cleared his throat.

            "Mr Lupin, whilst I applaud and admire you for your diligence, we will carry on with the lesson as I planned it." Remus leant back in his seat in despair as the professor began.

            "As I'm sure you are all aware, a werewolf is a person who is transformed, voluntarily or involuntarily, into a wolf under the influence of the full moon. Now, the word _werewolf_ is a contraction of the old-Saxon word _wer_, meaning man, and wolf. Therefore 'werewolf' translated literally means 'manwolf'." The class was taking notes when a pale hand shot up in the row in front. James turned to roll his eyes at Lupin with a grin.

            "Here we go." Professor Morgan stopped talking and said,

            "Yes Mr Snape?" Severus Snape was always very conscientious in his Defence Against the Dark Arts lessons, and this one was no exception. Lupin was vaguely aware that Snape was asking a question relating to changes in the werewolf's human behaviour before full moons, and he heard Sirius say something, but he wasn't listening. His mind was no longer in the brightly lit classroom with his laughing classmates.

*          *          *

            Instead he was in a wood, by himself except for the low noise of snarling from somewhere around him that told him he wasn't alone. He was running through the trees faster than he had ever run before, the sound of footsteps behind him ringing in his ears. He was sure he was screaming, he must have been screaming, but no sound was coming out save for his ragged breaths. The snarling was getting louder and so were his ragged urgent breaths. He had to get away from the terrifying beast that was chasing him, but where to go? He couldn't hide-it would find him. He couldn't risk slowing down-it was too fast. He could feel his heart hammering against his ribcage like a bird fighting to get out of a cage; it was beating so fiercely that he could practically hear it. He kept running, even faster now, and still the snarling was as loud as ever. He was running so fast that he didn't even see the tree root, and before he knew it he was falling. The ground was coming closer, and with a mounting sense of terror he realised that the snarling sound was coming closer too, and he could also hear howls mixed in with the snarls. He tried to get up, but was paralysed by fear. Looking up in despair, he saw a huge form above him, with sharp gleaming teeth and ferocious eyes. He tried to scream again, and this time he could hear himself screaming. He realised that someone was calling his name; it sounded far away, but came nearer and nearer.

*          *          *

            "Remus J Lupin!" Remus felt someone slap him and his eyes opened, even though he didn't remember closing them. He looked round and saw his classmates above him staring at him. He realised that he was slumped over his desk, and James, Sirius and Peter were looking at him with looks of apprehension mixed with concern. Remus got up with some effort, and looked in front of him to see who had slapped him. His grey eyes met a pair of bright green eyes full of concern. He smiled weakly and said,

            "Hello Lily." When he said this, Lily breathed a thankful sigh and cast her eyes up to the heavens. James came over and sat back down next to Remus, relief apparent in his mannerisms and voice.

            "Bloody hell Remus, you scared me. Next time I turn round to talk to you, I don't want to see you screaming and then fainting, do you understand?" Remus rubbed his eyes.

            "Is that what I did? I… I didn't realise what was happening. One minute I was awake, then the next…"

            "Forget about it," said Sirius bracingly. "You probably just fell asleep and had a bad dream or something." Peter looked closely at Remus.

            "You're probably still slightly ill or something. Fevers can bring on fits sometimes. Do you want to go back up to the hospital wing?" When Remus shook his head, Peter shrugged at the other two. 

            "I'm fine," he said calmly although quite abruptly. "Really." The others still looked unconvinced though, and in Remus' mind the end of the lesson couldn't come quickly enough. He left the classroom, lost in thought.

            "_They're not stupid. Sirius and James are two of the brightest people in the year. They'll figure it out. I don't want them to, but I think they will." _James watched Remus' back retreat, and then quietly signalled to Peter and Sirius to follow him. Making sure that Remus was well out of earshot, James hissed,

            "Come with me." Sirius raised his eyebrows, but followed James anyway towards a large tree in the grounds. Peter stopped abruptly.

            "James, that's the Whomping Willow. Do you want us to get killed?" James rolled his eyes and carried on walking. He sat under the tree, but far enough from the trunk to avoid touching it and therefore any risk of attack. He motioned for Sirius and Peter to sit with them, which they both did so; Sirius curiously, Peter apprehensively. After a short period of silence, Sirius couldn't take it any longer.

            "Well?! Come on then James, it has to be something important for you to be like this." James merely pulled a notebook out of his pocket and opened it. In spite of themselves, Peter and Sirius leant in to hear what he was trying to say.

            "Look at this. Don't shout at me, but you know I keep a diary? Well, I obviously write down everything that happens, and last night I collected all the dates that Remus has ever been ill since first year onto one page." Catching Sirius' disapproving eye, James ignored it and carried on. "Just hear me out. He seems to be ill at certain times of every month… am I the only one who's slightly concerned by that? Now, I did a bit of research." Here James stopped; he didn't feel able to tell the other two what he'd found out. Perhaps Sirius sensed this, because he very gently prised the notebook from James' grip and read what was on the page. His facial expression quickly changed from curious to a mixture of disbelief and shock. He looked up, ashen faced, at James.

            "Are you sure about this, James?" Peter looked on, confused, as James nodded sadly. 

            "It's all there Sirius. I've checked and double-checked each and every date that he's been ill. That lesson today has pretty much confirmed everything I've written there. Remus is ill every full moon. A day or two before those dates, I've written that he gets grumpy, withdrawn, and even slightly aggressive. Professor Morgan told us that those are exactly the symptoms that werewolves suffer just before full moons." Sirius was, for once, at a loss for words. Peter now piped up.

            "J-James, are you suggesting that Remus is a-" James motioned frantically for him to be quiet as a gang of Slytherins walked past them. Peter was silent for a few moments, and then finished his sentence.

            "Are you suggesting that Remus is a…. a…. w-w-werewolf?" James nodded solemnly.

            "That's exactly what I'm suggesting." His words hung in the deathly silence that followed.

*          *          *

Another cliffhanger! Please review this, I'd like to know that I'm not just writing for myself, and any advice is appreciated. More soon!


	3. Confrontation

Chapter 3 

A/N: A huge thank you to the people who have reviewed so far! Well, they confront him in this chapter. It's been a long time coming, but it was quite difficult to write. Hopefully it's not too schmaltzy but not too cold. Enjoy! R/R, feedback would really be appreciated on this chapter.

Disclaimer: As ever, JK Rowling is supreme. I am a mere blot in her universe. And I have a mortal fear of lawyers.

            The three friends sat in total silence, trying to take in what they had just realised. Finally, Sirius voiced what they were all silently thinking.

            "So, do we confront Remus?" James nodded slightly reluctantly.

            "I guess we have to. I mean it's a pretty big thing to keep secret, especially from your best mates. We'll have to do it quite soon too, otherwise we won't do it at all." James stopped to glare at Peter, who had begun to whimper. "Look Pete, it's not as if we're confronting him when he's a werewolf, it'll be when he's very much human. Besides, I refuse to let this be. I can see why he didn't tell us, but I want to hear it from him." Sirius straightened up, evidently trying to regain his composure.

            "James, we can't just rush into something like this. That'd be a wonderful conversation wouldn't it? 'Hello Remus, how's things, lovely weather we're having. Oh and tell us, how long have you been a werewolf?' It's silly." James rubbed his eyes.

            "I know what you're saying Sirius, but we need to do it soon. Otherwise we'll chicken out and he'll never know that we know. This is one secret I don't want to pretend I don't know." He became lost in thought, and the silence was only broken when Peter ventured to speak and say that they should really get to their Potions lesson.

*          *          *

            They walked into the classroom, to find no sign of Remus. James looked confusedly at Peter and Sirius, who both looked equally bewildered; Remus would never miss a lesson. They sat down, and when the Potions master excused himself for a few moments and went out of the room, they immediately heard a drawling voice behind them.

            "Wonder where Lupin is? He's probably up in his dormitory swooning like a girl. Did you see him in Defence Against the Dark Arts this morning? Honestly, what a wuss." Sirius clenched his fists angrily and made to turn round, but James shot him a warning look and instead he himself turned to face a boy named Vincent Jones, a particularly nasty Slytherin. 

            "Remus isn't feeling too well. Do you have a problem with that?" Jones scowled at James, his contempt apparent.

            "I have no problem with it, Potter. I just want to know why he seems to be ill all the time." Jones began to sneer. "Does he miss his mummy? Is that it? Poor ickle baby Remus misses his parents. How sweet." 

            It all happened within a few seconds; Sirius leapt off his chair, his face contorted in fury, his fists ready to fly at Jones. The Slytherin boys in the Potions class stood to defend Vincent, the Gryffindor boys got to their feet to come to Sirius' aid if they were needed and James and Peter tried vainly to stop Sirius from advancing towards Jones. Sirius was roaring practically incoherent threats. 

            "You say another word against Remus and I swear I'll kill you, Jones! You have no right!" Jones looked at Sirius with venom in his blue eyes.

"Since when were you his keeper?" he spat. "Don't tell me, the Black sense of loyalty comes through again! Next thing you know he'll follow in his dear brother's footsteps. Tell me, how many people has Regulus cursed this week?" The tense scene was only dispelled when a soft voice said,

            "Don't tell me this is all over little old me?" Everyone in the room turned to see Remus standing in the doorway, his pale face obviously torn between shock and a trace of amusement. He walked towards his friends, took his books out of his bag and sat down quietly. After a pause, he looked up and said, "Isn't anyone else going to sit down?" Sirius opened his mouth to protest but something in Remus' eyes made him sigh and sit down, just in time for the Potions master to return and find his class seated as if nothing had happened.

*          *          *

After the lesson, the four Gryffindor boys headed to their dormitory. They reached the scarlet room and as Peter fell onto the bed with some sense of relief, Remus rounded on Sirius.

"Are you absolutely mad?!" he bellowed. "You could have got yourself in serious trouble if Professor Gratis had walked in when I did. Honestly Sirius, with your reputation with the teachers, you could have been suspended, if not something worse! I'm not having you lot getting into trouble because of me!" Remus paused here, his eyes shining, and Peter took advantage of the silence to squeak,

"It's only because we care about you Remus." He almost regretted this when Remus turned to face him, his eyes ablaze with something intangible, something that none of the boys had ever seen in him before. They had never seen Remus get as angry as this, and were silently willing him to speak to break the tension. When he spoke his voice was quiet as ever, but with an edge to it.

"Listen to me. I know you care, but I don't want any of you to… to get hurt. People around me tend to get hurt. I would hate for it to happen to any of you." Remus' voice died out here, and he sank onto the bed with his head in his hands. Sirius looked down, worried. James and Peter glanced at each other, and then at Sirius. The three boys nodded at each other in a way that said, "It's now or never." James took a deep breath and took a tentative step towards Remus, who was still sat with his head buried in his hands. Feeling slightly more confident, James walked towards the bed and sat down next to Remus on his right hand side. As he sat, the confidence seeped away as quickly as it had come to him. He tried to hold onto it, but it was like struggling to hold onto water in cupped hands and he felt himself shiver. 

"Remus." Something in James' voice made Remus look up, and James was troubled by the look in his eyes. He was afraid that Remus was about to cry, and he knew that if he started, everyone else would soon follow. He continued slightly shakily, "You should know that we see you as a really … a really good mate. And we… we would never desert you or anything. Never." All the while he was talking, James wasn't really hearing what he was saying; he was silently willing Remus to look up and understand what he was saying. "Not even if you had a really bad secret." James' voice failed him here, and he looked to his other two friends for help. Sirius came and sat down on Remus' left.

"Not even if this secret was terrible, or if you thought it would make us hate you. You're too good a friend. I wouldn't have a go at that creep Jones for just anyone now, would I?" In spite of himself, Remus smiled at this and shook his head. Peter took this opportunity to come and sit, almost kneel in front of Remus. Sat as they were, he three formed something like a protective triangle round their friend.

"We wouldn't react badly. We promise you Remus. Not even if the secret is that you're descended from Slytherin. Or that you have a thing for Madam Pomfrey. Or that you really don't like us after all." James then said very quietly,

"Or that you're a werewolf." He allowed these words to sink in, and then Remus very suddenly got up and walked towards the window. Peter made to follow but Sirius flung out an arm to stop him. Remus stood looking dully out of the window at the people in the grounds for a time, then with what looked like a considerable effort turned to face his three best friends. His grey eyes had lost their twinkle, and he looked distressed yet strangely defiant. When he spoke, his voice was unnaturally calm.

"Well." His eyes ran from face to nervous face. "I have to give you credit where it's due. You certainly figured it out fast. The children I grew up with took three years to make the connections, and it took you guys just under one and a half years. I am impressed." Unbidden, the image of the snarling beast flashed in front of his eyes and he inhaled sharply. Before he knew it, words were uncontrollably spilling out of his mouth.

*          *          *

            "I was almost seven years old when I received the bite. I was outside, playing in the woods near my home, because Mum was out seeing some friends and Dad was at work. I didn't even see it coming up behind me. The next thing I knew I was running for my life. I was being chased. I couldn't hide. I couldn't see what was chasing but I could feel it; it made my skin cold, it made me sweat. Even though I was too young to fully understand what it was, it radiated power. I've never forgotten the snarling sound it made when it was chasing me. That's why I sometimes wake up screaming in the middle of the night. I go back to that place and that time in my dreams, in my nightmares. And I can still hear the growls; I can still feel the heat of its breath before it bit me. I can still see my father's face, hear my mother's crying hysterically when she saw me run through the door with a bleeding and bitten arm, shouting something about a wolf with a long snout biting me." Remus closed his eyes, and recited something unfamiliar to the boys in the room. _"__Even a man who is pure of heart and says his prayers by night can become a wolf when the wolfsbane blooms and the moon is shining bright."_ He seemed to have completely forgotten the presence of the other three boys in the room as he opened his eyes and continued.

            "Of course, my parents were shocked, worried, scared. I'll never grasp how they managed to make me understand how the attack would change my life. Books could only take me so far, and a lot of the time my father had to just sit me down and tell me what would happen. Imagine that… having to tell a six-year-old boy that he wouldn't be able to play with his friends on certain days of the year. Not that I had many friends in that borough anyway." Remus stopped here, and gave a small smile. "Do you see why I didn't tell you? Please tell me that you know why I didn't say anything. It's unforgivable to keep such a big secret from your friends. But you see, I… I've never had friends like you guys before. I just didn't want to lose you three by telling you my secret. Who w-w-wants to be f-f-friends with a f-f-freak…" The rest of the sentence was lost in Remus' racking sobs as he broke down and sank to his knees, sobbing heartbreakingly. 

Sirius, James and Peter, who had all been sitting quietly listening, looked at each other, the sorrow visible on every face. Then Sirius, breathing deeply, got up and moved towards Remus. Dropping onto his knees, he said nothing but slowly put his arms round Remus. Even through his tears, Remus saw James and finally Peter come and sit with him and follow Sirius' lead. Nobody in the quartet said anything for a long time; they all just sat there silently, their closeness growing slowly stronger with the more time that passed. Finally, James broke the silence very tentatively.

"Remus… we did say that we wouldn't desert you. And James Potter never goes back on a promise. I'm pretty sure that Sirius Black and Peter Pettigrew don't either." Those two nodded their agreement, and James smiled at Remus as he continued. "So Mr. Lupin, are we mates or what?" Remus looked up, hardly daring to believe it. No words followed, just a long session where the four friends sat and talked. And told each other everything.

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Phew! R/R people, the next chapter should be up shortly.


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